Stories
Nick Bollinger
“Dad talked to me from the moment I opened my eyes, and I can remember conversations all through those sixteen years with him.”
Nick Bollinger’s dad was known to many as a wise and kind man before he died when Nick was sixteen. The writer and broadcaster reckons he’d still be doing what he does had his father lived, but he would have found his way much sooner.
Lendl Oosthuizen
“Mum hugged me and said, ‘Your dad has gone to heaven’.”
Lendl Oosthuizen’s family moved from Zimbabwe to New Zealand in 2003. Settling in Hawke’s Bay, a year and a half later everything changed again for the sixteen-year-old when her father was killed in a car crash.
David Lawrence
“The worst thing in my life was also responsible for some of the best things in my life.”
David Lawrence found so much comfort in Shakespeare’s Hamlet after his father died when he was fifteen that he made theatre his life, creating a lasting connection to his theatre-loving dad.
Catherine Peters
“All I wanted was for everyone to be together … that’s probably my greatest sadness.”
Her father’s fatal heart attack when Catherine Peters was sixteen had many immediate and obvious impacts on her family. Decades later, it’s perhaps the impact on her relationships with her sisters that is her biggest and most lasting sadness.
Renée
“My father clearly didn’t give a hoot about what would happen to us”
The writer Renée Taylor – known simply as Renée – endured a start in life as dramatic as one of her plays when her father inexplicably shot himself, leaving his wife and children homeless and penniless.
Michael Huddleston
“He just seemed impregnable. If there is an end that’s inevitable, be honest about it and discuss it.”
Michael Huddleston lives with a heart condition that’s possibly the same one that killed his father when Michael was only fifteen. Now a father of two, he’s determined to have more time with his own children than his dad did with him.
James Bushell
“It gets a lot easier to deal with emotionally, and there can be as much joy in what you had, as sadness in what’s been lost.”
James Bushell’s arts-loving dad died after a short illness when James was in his mid-teens. His mother gave him space and independence as they both grieved his father, something James believes preserved their still-close relationship.
Kate Walker
“The thing I miss the most is not having an adult relationship with my father”
Kate Walkers’ dad died suddenly when she was eleven. He’d gone to bed with a headache, then was taken to hospital during the night. He never came home.
Kat Schwarzkopf
“If my Papa had lived, I probably would have learned to fly an aeroplane!”
Kat Schwarz’s father died suddenly when he fell through a roof. Kat thinks of her Papa, and his love for aviation, whenever she sees a small plane in flight.
Caitlin Cherry
“It’s up to me to look after myself, there’s nothing coming my way”
Caitlin Cherry’s dad left New Zealand for Australia when she was six then died suddenly when she was nine. Growing up with little money and less support, Caitlin knew she had only herself to rely on.
Helen Goodwin
“I don't remember crying for him, particularly. He was not much like a dad.”
Helen Goodwin’s dad died suddenly and unexpectedly, even though he’d been ill for some years. Helen felt conflicted about her father’s death, and psychologically stuck, until she discovered change was possible.